Quit playin’

Alright. I have made plan a hundred times and made a hundred lines or lies that to subside my mind. This fancy seperation from the righteous life I desire is merely a few steps towards grace. My hesitance springs from sitting on a mountain of wisdom and relevant revelation poured fresh from the mouth of a Living God. How can I be so still and not fully know he is God. I mean, I know. But if I really knew, would I be so slow to do what I was chosen to do. I hear and hear and hear so clear that no mistake could be made. I constantly check my heart for motives, tussle between spirit and truth and personal accolade. I shake my head with indecision to complete the commission and boast spiritual circumcision. And then the judgement comes and comes, how quickly swiftly does it pour from my tongue and now I’m sprung to release the truth for truth not tooth for tooth, with no excuse and solid proof that God is everything he says he is but. . . I still fall desperately short of good enough. Its the wages, I wager, I savor my decisions sin incisions, cut deep through the marrow, I know, I can only go as far as I surrender. So selfish I choose to staple down the layers of flesh and make a tent a cozy home of blemishes when he said he saw me perfect. I’m steady creasing my wrinkles when he said He made me worthy, I’m dirty. with something that flirts with a reprobate mind. And this time is still ticking pulling the passion inside. it’s easy to not believe me.
It’s not easy to believe in me.
It’s never easy to believe me ~oh no
How could you ever believe
I know the answer. There is so much inside of me.
You shared the answer
With every part of me
You told me you made me
You made me to glory
and then you even gave me a passionate story
And I gotta let you turn the pages
Quit playin’ with the wages
the wages of my lies
the instrument of my lungs
and my tongue
most of all my unbelief
The answer is that I am unafraid
i am unafraid
The answer is I am unafraid
The answer is that I am not alone
I am not alone
the answer is that I am not alone with out an Ur or Aaron
The answer is that sometimes all I know is me and that’s the remedy for falling
The antidote is simple, just find your hands flying higher than your understanding
And cry
Cry out
Give it up
Let it go.
Fall into the safety sometimes
Quit playing with prideful “indecision”
And cry out
Give it up
Let it go
Don’t waste your life
Throw up your hands.
And Stand.
For Everything.

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